It's Tuesday January 18th—my first day back at the office. I unlock the front door, notice that the alarm is off, so someone is here already. I go up the stairs. Everything looks the same. I hang up my shoulder bag and my coat, turn on the computer and head to the kitchen to make coffee. I run into someone I don't recognize. It's the new "Executive Assistant" to Clare and Michelle, Sherrie Dye. She gives me a strange look, as if to say: "Who are you?" I give the same look right back at her, and say, "I'm Rick. I've been off on bereavement. Who are you?"
She breaks into a smile and says, "I'm Sherrie, Clare and Michelle's assistant. I've heard a lot about you; nice to meet you finally. How are you doing?"
"Nice to meet you too; I'm doing about as well as can be expected. My emotions are still all over the map. I think it's nice to be back, just not sure yet."
It turned out to be a pretty strange day. Of course, everyone had to come up and say how nice it was to have me back, and they naturally wanted to know how I'm doing, which leads me to conversations I don't really want to have, because I know I'll probably be weepy off and on all day long—and that's what came to pass. I was never so glad when 5pm arrived and I could get out of there.
Be careful what you wish for, surprises can appear. I had made it through the first full day back at the office. I picked up the mail from the mailbox before heading up the stairs to the front door. I stopped at the door and just couldn't bring myself to put the key in the lock. It really hit me emotionally—I'm coming into an empty house. It wasn't the first time I'd come back to an empty house, but it was the first time since getting "back into a work routine" so it just seemed strange. I finally put the key in the lock, unlocked the door and went inside. In looking through the mail, I noticed that Dennis's sister Sandie had sent yet another card. I've been receiving so many cards from Sandie (all very much appreciated) that I was beginning to wonder if she had stock options in Hallmark...LOL. I opened the envelope, and I started to read the outside of the card, which was talking about "a new star in the sky tonight" and I just lost it. With Dennis being an Aquarian and with his head "always in the stars" anyhow, the words just got to me. I cried my way into the living room, sat down and just sobbed for about 20 minutes, non-stop. It was a good, cleansing cry, and I really did feel better afterwards.
My friend Lisa Duncan had told me during one of our conversations that I should watch for "signs" that Dennis was out there, watching over me. She's a fellow Aquarian and she and Dennis had a very spiritual friendship. After I parked the car by the office the next morning, I started walking towards the office just before 8am. As you are probably aware, a lot of the time you can still see the moon in the morning, even though the sky is getting lighter with the sunrise. I happened to look up in the sky while walking, and noticed the moon and what I figured was Venus a bit below and to the right of the moon, as many times in the mornings you can see Venus as it's usually pretty bright. A couple minutes later, I looked up in the sky again, saw the moon but "Venus" was no longer there. I stopped and just stared for a minute. I thought, "Where did that star go? I know I saw it just a minute ago." Then it hit me. I smiled and said, "Was that you, dear? Did you just wink at me with that disappearing star?" Coincidence? I don't really believe in coincidences, so I'm ready to believe that he was sending me a message—I'm right here for you.
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