I phone Carl. When he answered, I said, "Carl, can you reach Evan and both of you come over? Hugh just called and he and EZ are going to be here in a couple hours. If you and Evan come at the same time, we can have a championship team reunion. I'm sure that will please Dennis."
"Sounds great, Rick. I'll hop right on it and see you in a couple of hours."
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| Cinchkronicity - Champs Spring 2001 |
Dennis and I played together in the San Francisco Pool Association for 26 years (I'm still playing). During that entire time, our team only managed to win one team title. In the photo (from left to right) are Carl, EZ, Evan, Dennis, Hugh, and me. My sister Mary took the photo; she was out visiting SF with her former sister-in-law and the day they were in town was our Awards Party. She and Sue came to the party, got to meet a lot of our friends; after the party, we went back to the house, as she had never seen it before (other than photos).
Carl and Evan arrived first, followed by EZ and his girlfriend, Nancy; Hugh arrived last. I proposed a group hug so we could share our memories of Dennis. Nancy got up from the couch to join but I stopped her. "Not yet, Nancy. You can join us in a minute, but this time it's just the team first. Okay?"
"I understand, Rick. You guys go ahead."
I was already crying, and found it hard to talk. "We're gathered here today to honor Dennis, who was much more than just a teammate to all of us. He was my soulmate, he was a great friend to all of you. His wonderful spirit, gentle demeanor, and that fantastic smile will be missed by all of us. Here's to you my love. We miss your presence, but you will always be with us in spirit and in our hearts."
After a moment of silence, we asked Nancy to join us. "Thank you, Nancy, for allowing us the team time before you joined us. I appreciate your understanding."
Sitting around after the hug, we all had our stories to tell. Looking at the photo of us that his nephew John took of us at the family reunion in September, a thought occurred to me. I started laughing and everyone turned to look at me.
"See this photo? Not only is Dennis smiling, I think at the moment he's laughing at me, in a good-natured way. I just realized something. The night he died, I had been making a pot of coffee, going back and forth between the kitchen and the living room. After I did the first pour, when I came back to the living room, Dennis's eyes were open and he was staring at the ceiling, at least that's what it looked like to me. At first, I thought he had died and I missed it, but I saw his chest moving so I knew he was still here. I returned to the kitchen for the second pour, and when I came back in, he was in the same exact state—eyes open, staring at the ceiling. I went to my chair, sat down, and said, 'Are you awake, dear?' He didn't respond, so I knelt next to him, kissed his forehead, held his hand and told him, 'I love you, dear.' Within seconds of that, I heard a small gurgle in his throat and he was gone. What I just realized is that he probably could not talk at the very end and by having his eyes open and staring off into space, he was trying to get my attention. The reason I feel he's laughing at me in this photo is because I was always the slow one when it came to 'getting it' with regards to spiritual matters. I was the grounded Taurean, he was the Aquarian airhead, but he 'got it' a lot sooner than I did. So I want to say to Dennis, 'I'm sorry dear, you know it always takes me a while to catch on.' But the one thing I did right—I was here for him, just like we had discussed."
Having the old pool team together, even for just a few hours, meant the world to me. The people we know from the pool league are and will always be life-long friends. I know they are all here for me to help get through this difficult time.
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